Bethy Rose says I'm the bestest mother in the whole wide world. That covers a lot of territory I say and I remind her that I never gave birth to a child so I'm not a "real" mother. She understands that when her mother died and things got rough with her dad not being there and into some illegal behavior, that I was only too glad to go to court to seek acceptance as a foster parent. We both agreed that she would become my foster child and I would be a stand-in mother. At the end of my reminder about what brought us together is when she put her hands on her hips (I wonder where she got that?) and informed me that it takes more than having a baby to be a mother. This child is far too wise. Is she only nine years old?
Thinking this conversation over, I have to admit that for all intents and purposes when I was six and my "real" Mama died, Lutie Mae Lucas, maiden aunt, certainly without child, became my mother. She was there to hold me as I cried over the loss of the only parent I had left. Aunt Lutie put her arms around me when I was so scared in the hearing that would place me in the custody of my aunt--I had been so scared that the state department in charge of orphans would take me away, that I threw up on the courthouse steps before entering. Aunt Lutie took me to the water fountain and wet her pretty handkerchief to wipe my mouth--and gave me a stick of gum so I didn't gross out the authorities. From then on she attended PTA meetings, baked cupcakes for special school days, helped me with homework, and made sure I went to Sunday School. She bought my clothes, gave me my own room in the tiny apartment above the Blue Moon, and my feisty aunt was always there for me.
But most of all, she set me on the right path to become the woman I am today--with good parts and a lot of warts, too. Lutie Mae offered me her wisdom, her experiences in life, her dreams, even ones unfulfilled, and she gave me the courage to follow my dreams--though somehow she saw to it that her dreams became my dreams, too. She was my moral compass in all things.
Bethy Rose says I do all the things a "real" mother should do. I'm not sure I do, but I do know that Aunt Lutie did.
Aunt Lutie, you've been pretty quiet lately, but I hope you are near enough to hear me. I want you to know how much I love you, how wonderful I thought you were while growing up (though I never said so). I miss you. I could sure use your help with this mothering stuff. But I do have one great memory for our tradition on Mother's Day. We went to brunch (Miguel is taking us) and I always made you some useless pretty as a gift (Bethy Rose has been closed up in her room a lot so is probably doing the same thing). Then we'd make something in the kitchen later. I'm going to add that to our traditions, my dear Aunt. We're going to make Peanut Butter and Jelly Fudge. I'll save you a piece.
PEANUT BUTTER AND JELLY FUDGE:
4-1/2 cups sifted confectioners sugar
2 cups graham cracker crumbs
1 cup creamy peanut butter
1 cup margarine or butter, melted
1 (10-oz) package peanut butter chips
1/3 cup strawberry preserves
In a large bowl, combine sugar, graham crackers, peanut butter and butter; stir until well blended. Line a 9X13-inch pan with two layers of aluminum foil, extending it over ends of pan; grease foil. Press mixture into pan.
To prepare topping: Place peanut butter chips in microwavable bowl; microwave on high power one minute; stir. Continue to microwave until chips are melted; stir every 15 seconds. Stir until smooth. Spread melted chips over peanut butter mixture. Using edges of foil, immediately lift from pan. Spread jelly over melted chips. Cool in refrigerator. Cut into 1-inch squares and store in airtight containers in refrigerator.
